I want so badly to write something worth reading, to
hold myself some way other than violently, to
stop treating my body like one massive bruise.
I know you know exactly what I mean when I say
that I am full of that lukewarm coffee feeling
and that I can’t quite stomach myself today-
I’m too bitter.
I’m too busy
brushing away the cobwebs on my grief
to understand that now is not the time or place
to try to pour myself down the sink
and wash it all away with hot water.